So my brother and I went to Acadia last night for open mic. We were shooting some pool when this lady walked up, put a quarter on the table, and challenged the winner. She was blonde, late 40s, still slim, wore those black-rimmed glasses that are so popular right now – kind of “teacher” hot. Anyway, my brother won that game, so he was like, “OK lady, are you ready?” That’s when she uncovered her case and assembled her cue stick. Oh yeah, she was ready.
They played for a while, and then she walked over and started trying to flirt. That’s when all the mysterious Mrs. Robinson hotness disappeared as I noticed the huge gaps between her teeth on the left side. In her defense, my roommate was like, “maybe she was just missing teeth.” I was like, oh, that obviously makes it better because while I can’t see myself dating a 47-year-old with gap teeth, I can totally see myself dating a 47-year-old with missing teeth. “Mom, Dad, this is my 47-year-old girlfriend who is missing teeth. I love her.”
Yeah, so anyway, that was our exciting night.