Sunday, July 16, 2006

Let's face it. I'm a nerd.

Originally uploaded by ffacker.
My weekend just culminated in grand disappointment. I was set to play a show at The Boat this afternoon, and I spent all weekend just resting and practicing because I hadn't played a show by myself in over a month now. I show up. They're like, eh, it's hot, and it might rain again, we don't want you.

I already knew I needed to find a new venue, but this Sunday afternoon thing was just so nice because there's no way I can play a weeknight thing until 2 a.m. and still make it to work. It's time to redefine my goals and set a more aggressive pace for myself. I either have to decide if I'm going to be a 9-5 Joe who spends his life in the office and his free time on the couch or if I'm going to get motivated and make my music and acting career happen.

I haven't been devoting the time to practice that I should. I haven't written a word on my new script since February. I've got to get in gear. I've spent my life thinking opportunity was just going to present itself and come knocking on my door, but I've finally realized I have to get off my ass and go find it.

I'm also sad about the show today because some of my friends from the band 4Play were coming out to see me. I realy wanted to impress them because I thought maybe I could get booked to open a few of their shows. Oh well.

Maybe I shouldn't be playing acoustic shows anyway. Maybe I need to find a real band and get back to the electric thing. I don't know. Most of my songs work both ways since I write them on acoustic, but they sure sound nice with leads and drums.

I haven't been out all weekend. I've stayed home and eaten peanut butter and jelly, hot dogs, and baked potatoes for every meal this week in an attempt to save money. It seems like no matter how much I make, there's always circumstances that suck it all away -- and not fun circumstances like vacations. Just crappy circumstances like things breaking and house costs, etc. Sometimes I wish I just lived in a cave by the ocean where I fished and subsistence farmed. Just be a total hermit with no connection to society at all. I think the only thing I'd really miss is soda. Damn soda for being such an incredible tasty and addictive beverage.

I promised Brittany and Teresa that I'd come sing at their karaoke night tonight at Olde City Pub. Brittany just got hired to start hosting it, so they need people to come out. At least I'll get to sing somewhere today.
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