To keep from needlessly euthanizing bears in Alaska, the parks department has decided to attempt to dye the bears different colors for identification. That way they can track which bears are being sighted in various areas.
But what if the bears decide they like their new dye jobs? What if bears with highlights and frosted tips really start pulling down the mates? Will they start visiting the beauty shop every two weeks to keep their hair styles up to date? What if they start getting manicures, but starve to death because they don't want to mess up their nails?